Kentucky Sports Radio

University of Kentucky Basketball, Football, and Recruiting news brought to you in the most ridiculous manner possible.
October 29th, 2014

Julius Randle will have surgery this morning

Randle being taken to the ambulance, alongside his mom. (@Rachel__Nichols)

According to RealGM’s Shams Charania, Julius Randle will have surgery this morning to repair his fractured right tibia. The Lakers are expected to release an official update later today.

While Randle was being tended to on the court, Kobe Bryant came over to comfort the rookie. “I just told him, ‘Keep your spirits up,'” Kobe told reporters afterwards. “We’ll help him through this. He’ll come back a better basketball player. That’s the goal, is to try to find the silver lining.”


Calipari says he’s “absolutely sick” over Julius Randle’s injury

In case you missed it late last night, Julius Randle broke his right leg in his NBA debut. The news is just awful, as are the pictures of Julius being taken off the court on a stretcher and his mother crying by his side. The Lakers are expected to release an update later today, but for now, all we know is Julius suffered a fractured tibia.

Many of us woke up to the horrible news, including John Calipari, who tweeted that he feels “absolutely sick” over it.

“Feel absolutely sick for Julius Randle, but I know he’s going to come back from this better than ever. I’m praying for you, kid. Hang in there.”

Many of Julius’ former teammates tweeted their support as well:


Funkhouser Presents: Prestigious Awards for Terrible Horror Movies

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Good evening! I’m glad you all could join us here at the Funkhouser Ballroom tonight. As Halloween is just around the corner, we thought this might be a great time to hand out some awards to our favorite horror films of the last thirty years. Remember, there was once a time when people who made movies didn’t expect or work hard for them to be good at all, and the mid-to-late-eighties and early nineties was a veritable smorgasbord of “If you have a horror movie, we will film it and release it to every theater in the country” thinking. It was beautiful, truly, and it brought us a slew of awful, awful films that were released with the same vim, vigor and marketing bucks as Gone Girl. It’s hard to believe, yes, but it was a glorious era. Shall we delve into some superlatives from this bygone horror-film Babylon, shall we? (Note: Most clips rated R for violence or language)

Best Laser-to-Head Explosion Delivered by a Renegade Mall Security Robot: Chopping Mall (1986)

Don’t you worry about why there might be a woman running through an empty mall in her underwear (she was partying in a closed furniture store) or why these robots are chasing her (they were struck by lightning and went haywire), just enjoy the fact that in the Chopping Mall universe it’s entirely possible for mall security to make your head explode. That’s why it’s important to LEAVE THE MALL WHEN THEY SAY THE MALL IS CLOSING.

Best Yogurt Horror: The Stuff (1985)

When you find something white and creamy bubbling out of the ground, and you don’t know what it is, it’s only the next logical step to market it to the general public as a new and delicious food. That’s the general logline of director Larry Cohen’s The Stuff. And I could extrapolate more on the plot, or you could just enjoy the following clip of Saturday Night Live’s Garrett Morris’ head melting while multi-time Screen Actors’ Guild Award Nominee Paul Sorvino shoots a machine gun at it.

Rubberiest Transformation into a Monster Dog: Monster Dog (1984)

Poor rock-and-roller Vince Raven (Alice Cooper). All he wants to do is shoot a music video for his newest video, “See Me in the Mirror,” at a secluded estate — and there’s a monster dog on the loose, killing people. How unfortunate! Warning: if you don’t want to know the ending of Monster Dog, don’t watch the following clip because it will ruin everything for you. If you don’t mind, by all means enjoy the transformation of Vince into the titular monster dog. Because it’s glorious.

Worst Day Out with Grandpa: Terrorvision (1986)

There’s nothing that will leave you with family issues more than watching your grandfather eaten by a monster that comes out of the television. Try explaining to your therapist that despite the fact you had a machine gun at eight years old, the hail of bullets you emptied into it just couldn’t stop the hideous alien creature reducing your dear ol’ pop-pop to liquid.

Most Ridiculously Strong Punch: Friday the 13th Part VIII: Jason Takes Manhattan (1989)

You might be the best boxer in the world, but it doesn’t matter if your opponent is the immortal lake-dwelling undead slasher Jason Voorhees, who will punch the hell out of your head. Such was the case of poor urban tough-guy Julius in Jason Takes Manhattan. The round belongs to Jason. (Warning: language/punching NSFW)

Best Basketball Pass: Deadly Friend (1986)

It’s a timeless tale: boy meets girl, boy falls in love, girl is killed, boy puts a microchip in her brain, turning her into a killing robot-person. But the truly amazing thing is young robot-girl Samantha’s sports abilities, on display in the following clip as she executes a perfect pass just above the numbers.

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Georgia’s Todd Gurley reinstated, but will have to sit out the Kentucky game

This morning, the NCAA announced that Georgia running back Todd Gurley has been reinstated following his autograph scandal, but he must sit a total of four games (30% of the season) for accepting more than $3,000 in cash from multiple individuals for autographed memorabilia over two years.

Gurley has already missed two games, so he’ll have to sit out two more, which means he won’t be allowed to play until November 15, which means he’ll miss the Kentucky game on November 8. That is great news, because our run defense had no shot of containing him.


Unpopular opinions and Doug Gottlieb (Wednesday Show Thread)

Have you ever had an opinion about something you knew most people wouldn’t agree with? Today’s show is for you. Matt, Ryan, and Shannon are taking your unpopular opinions today about anything–UK, Subway sandwiches, whatever. The best unpopular opinion will win tickets to the UK/Pikeville game from GuyOnTheCornerTickets.com. Doug Gottlieb will also call in, and no, he’s not eligible to win the tickets.

They’ll also discuss Julius Randle’s awful injury last night, which I just can’t seem to shake off this morning, as well as UK’s game against Missouri on Saturday and any other random leftovers.

Join in on the fun by calling (502) 571-1080.

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BTI’s Rants and Ramblings: A Little Preview of Today’s KSR….

I know that on today’s KSR, Matt and the gang are going to take a bunch of calls from people who have opinions that might be unpopular.  When I heard that Matt was doing this, an email I received 4 years ago immediately came to mind.  Back then, I was prone to putting up some pretty extreme opinions, not like today when I have become a sophisticated writer.  But back then I would get emails from time to time, mostly of threats of violence and past teachers embarrassed by my grammar.  But I got this email from a reader and thought it was a well thought out, reasoned approach to an opinion that I know will not be very popular.

I think back then it was almost completely crushed as ridiculous and I imagine the large majority of fans still won’t agree.  But with Richie Farmer’s recent prison appearance, I wonder if some fans have come around to the opinion written below.  So as a lead-in to today’s show, I give you an email from a longtime KSR reader.  Again: THIS IS NOT MY THOUGHTS, THIS IS AN EMAIL.

BTI,

I know you have basically made a living out of putting ridiculous things on KSR.  I thought I would pass along an argument I have had with friends and family, all UK fans, because nobody agrees with me and you seem like just the kind of guy who would.  Let me say that I am a HUGE Kentucky fan, and what I am about to say almost hurts me to write, but the more I think about it, the more I think I am right.

Here is my argument: THE UNFORGETTABLES SHOULD HAVE NEVER HAD THEIR JERSEYS RETIRED.

Seems completely blasphemous I know.  But hear me out.  Let me first say that the basis of my argument is that I consider the honor to have your name in the rafters of Rupp Arena to be a great accomplishment, and should be VERY difficult to do.  I don’t think Keith Bogans, Chuck Hayes, or Ramel and Joe deserve to be there.  The only people that need to be put up there that currently are not are Delk, Prince, and Patterson. 

But what especially bothers me about the Unforgettables is they were esentially liked by fans, but in reality had average careers, by Kentucky all-time great standards.  And let me be clear, I loved those guys too.  But, consider this, look at the scoring careers of each guy:

John Pelphrey: 1257 (32nd all-time)
Deron Feldhaus: 1232 (36th all-time)
Richie Farmer: 898 (69th all-time)
Sean Woods: 794 (82nd all-time)

Now, consider this stat: Who are the 4 UK players with retired jerseys who played 4 years and scored the least amount of points? Pelphrey, Feldhaus, Farmer, and Woods.

So my question is this: since when did Kentucky put players in the rafters simply for being loved by the fans?  If that was the case, let’s put Heshimu Evans and Cameron Mills up there.  Let’s put Ravi Moss in the rafters too, because people loved him.  No, that just sounds silly right?  Well, you can’t say the Unforgettables deserved the honor because of their stats or team success.  The team missed the tournament once, was banned from two tournaments, and made the Elite Eight in their time in Lexington.  The probation was out of their hands, I understand, and its admirable those guys stuck it out, but is it so admirable that they deserve to be in the rafters?

My final argument is this: If Farmer had been from Colorado, Pelphrey from Massachusetts, Woods from Illinois, and Feldhaus from California, would they be in the rafters?  I say no, even if the Duke game happens.  Simply put, those guys received the highest UK honor for losing an Elite Eight game and being from Kentucky and Southern Indiana.  And I just think that was a mistake.  

Signed, XXXXXXXXXXXXX


KSR’s Top 10 Tweets of the Day

Darrell Bird Catspause

Darrell Bird Catspause

It’s time again for KSR’s Top Tweets of the Day. We will focus most of our attention on Kentucky sports-centric tweets but, as usual, there are no limits to our madness. You can participate by using hashtags such as #BBN #KSR #KSRTop10 or just by simply tweeting @KYsportsradio.

#10 Perry Stevenson

That is a cruel game higher powers play on us.

 

 

 

#9 Ray J. Vaske

See. This never would have happened if Ryan had gone on the Waddy Werewolf hunt like he was supposed to.

 

 

 

#8 Akecheta

Aren’t you technically bringing your problems to twitter by bringing forth the problem that people talk about their problems?

 

 

 

#7 natalie bradley

Good luck with getting that. I am sure it is locked up in Fort Knox with all the gold.

 

 

 

#6 I Am T.V. Williams

You can do anything if you just believe.

 

 

 

#5 Devin Booker

Don’t worry. You will get there.

 

 

 

#4 Matt Hardesty

Actual representation.

 

 

#3 josh oram

That is totally worth the firing coming to you soon.

 

 

 

#2 John Calipari

Poor Cal…will someone get this man a puppy?

 

 

 

#1 Canturkey

I wonder how high this guy’s insurance is from all the claims he has to put in from the damage UL fans do to it.

 

@Sealey_KSR


Morning Monologue: Daniel Radcliffe Kills Alphabet Aerobics Like It Was Voldemort

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Daniel Radcliffe is back on the talk show circuit, promoting his movie Horns.  During his stop at Jimmy Fallon, it is revealed that Mr. Potter is a bit of a lyrical gangster.  Here he performs Blackalicious’ “Alphabet Aerobics”, which will blow your mind, if not at least keep the dementors away…

 


Julius Randle suffered a broken leg in his Laker debut

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Some late breaking news from Los Angeles, where Julius Randle was escorted out of the Staples Center on a stretcher in the fourth quarter of his NBA debut. TNT called it a broken leg on the broadcast, suffered on this drive to the basket:

Kobe Bryant and Carlos Boozer, two of Randle’s mentors in L.A., were visibly shaken as they attempted to keep Randle calm and help load him onto the stretcher. The former Cat was grimacing in pain as trainers put his leg in an air cast and wheeled him off the court.

@DuranSports

The Lakers should have an update some time on Wednesday, but it’s not looking good right now.

#PrayForJulius


October 28th, 2014

Tuesday Night News & Views

Hats off to this fine soul in Louisville for fighting the good fight. (@STUdebaker29)

On Tuesday, we enjoyed the leftovers from the Blue/White game before turning our sights back to football. Both programs doing so well at the same time is a luxury we don’t often have in the Bluegrass, and I have a feeling we’re about to enter a few weeks in which we are especially spoiled. The basketball team has six straight Sunday games starting with the Pikeville exhibition on Sunday night, and the football team has four chances to become bowl eligible. And judging by UK’s performance against Mississippi State, I think they can win three of those. #WhyNot

With that in mind, let’s start with Neal Brown and Patrick Towles’ comments about the big game against Missouri Saturday.

Neal Brown says he’s looking forward to having Boom Williams back on the field.

Yesterday, Mark Stoops told reporters that, barring any setbacks, Boom Williams will play against Missouri, and today, Neal Brown said he’s excited to have one of his top playmakers back in action.  “Excited to get him back. He’s a guy that we can get in space. I think he’s eager to get back on the field. I don’t think he played his best game against LSU. He realizes that, and he’ll add a spark to us for sure.” Patrick Towles agreed. “It’s huge,” Towles said. “He’s the kind of guy that really spreads out a defense. He’s quick. Y’all saw against Florida what kind of burst he has, so it’ll be great getting him back.”

Brown also said the offense is riding a wave of confidence after the Mississippi State game, but he’s anxious for the running backs to rebound after a tough outing. “We’ve got to feed the running backs and get them in a rhythm,” Brown said. “I think maybe we’re trying to play – trying to give too many guys carries, so I think we’ve got to slim that down.

Patrick Towles expects to win Saturday

After a career day against the number one team in the country, you can’t blame Patrick Towles for feeling confident. Towles said he’s looking forward to Saturday’s challenge, and totally thinks the Cats will become bowl eligible against the Tigers. “Winning SEC games on the road is always really tough, no matter who it’s against,” Towles said. “So we just gotta play disciplined and be focused. This is a very winnable game for us and we expect to win. So we just gotta go in there and execute.”

Gotta love that new Kentucky football swagger.

@JHNNsports

Gary Pinkel and Markus Golden expect to have their hands full with Towles

On Monday, Missouri head coach Gary Pinkel raved about Kentucky’s improvement this season on both sides of the ball. “They’ve really improved defensively. They’ve got good skill players and their quarterback is playing well. You have to watch him (Towles) as he can run pretty well. That’s what generally happens. If your defense starts playing better and a quarterback that is producing then you’re going to play better. Head Coach Mark Stoops has done a really good job.”

Senior defensive end Markus Golden agreed that Towles is legit. “He’s a pretty good player. He’s a big quarterback with a good arm. He’s mobile and can run too. He’s going to be a handful, but we’re going to go out there and handle it.”

The first College Football Playoff Rankings are out

…and the SEC West accounts for three of the top four:

1. Mississippi State
2. Florida State
3. Auburn
4. Ole Miss

I can hear Phyllis now: “But Paaaaaaawwwwwwl, where’s Bama??? (They’re sixth)

This guy’s Kentucky Joe costume is spot on

@realshanemunson

Now all he needs are some business cards to hand out to trick or treaters. Keep sending us your UK/KSR Halloween costumes and we’ll feature them throughout the week (tylerthompson@kentuckysportsradio.com or @MrsTylerKSR).

Anthony Davis celebrated the start of the NBA season by flirting with a triple double

Tonight is opening night in the NBA, and 19 former Cats began a new season in the big league, more than any other school. Who is where? Here’s the list:

Rajon Rondo, Boston
James Young, Boston
Michael Kidd-Gilchrist, Charlotte
Nazr Mohammed, Chicago
Jodie Meeks, Detroit
Terrence Jones, Houston
Julius Randle, LA Lakers
Tayshaun Prince, Memphis
Brandon Knight, Milwaukee
Anthony Davis, New Orleans
Darius Miller, New Orleans
Nerlens Noel, Philadelphia
Eric Bledsoe, Phoenix
Archie Goodwin, Phoenix
DeMarcus Cousins, Sacramento
Patrick Patterson, Toronto
Chuck Hayes, Toronto
Enes Kanter, Utah
John Wall, Washington

Four Cats are in action tonight. Darius Miller and Anthony Davis’ Pelicans beat the Magic, while Julius Randle and the Lakers just tipped off against Terrence Jones’ Rockets.

In case you needed further proof that Davis is now a superstar, he flirted with a triple double tonight, putting up 26 points, 17 rebounds, and 9 blocks. Phew.

Andy Dalton and Andrew Whitworth challenge the UK Basketball Team to #Layup4Lauren

By now, you may have heard of the #Layup4Lauren campaign. Lauren Hill is a college basketball player at Mount St. Joseph in Cincinnati, and was diagnosed with a rare form of brain cancer a year ago. The NCAA allowed Mount St. Joseph to move their opening game up to Sunday because Lauren’s condition is worsening. The inoperable tumor has forced the normally right-handed Lauren to shoot with her left hand and she’s unable to turn her head side-to-side without getting dizzy. To raise awareness and money for brain cancer research, Lauren started the #Layup4Lauren campaign and incorporated the side effects of her condition so that those who participate have to spin around five times and shoot a layup with their non-dominant hands. So far, Spud Webb, the Dallas Mavericks, Bengals quarterback Andy Dalton and left tackle Andrew Whitworth have completed the challenge, with Dalton and Whitworth issuing a challenge of their own to the UK Basketball team:

Best of luck to Lauren. To learn more about #Layup4Lauren, click here.

Tomorrow is Unpopular Opinion Wednesday on the radio show

On tomorrow’s show, Matt, Ryan, and Shannon will discuss their unpopular opinions and you should call in and share yours. I’ll get things started: unlike many people and almost all of my former coworkers, I’m not a fan of Subway. Subway’s sandwiches are subpar at best, and no matter how many times you wash your hands after eating them, they still smell like Subway because everything at Subway, regardless of what you order, smells the same. And that smell lingers all. day. long. Also, a friend once told me that the only reason Jared of Subway fame started eating Subway for every meal was because it was on the ground floor of his apartment building. Sure, Subway may offer “healthy” options and have a catchy jingle, but they can’t hold a candle to the millions of other sandwich chains out there. (Looking at you, Firehouse Subs. You’re awesome.) Sorry, Madison.

You’re up. What’s your #UnpopularOpinion?


Best-Case, Worst-Case For Missouri

When Missouri joined the ranks of the SEC many viewed them as a team that would add some credibility in basketball while struggling in football. In year 1 that was certainly the case as the Tigers went 2-6 in the conference and failed to make a bowl. However, in year 2 the Tigers flipped the script and surprised everyone by winning the SEC east. Since, that magical run the Tigers have lost senior QB James Franklin, SEC co-defensive POY Michael Sam, and sensational sophmore receiver Dorial Green-Beckam to slide back into the mid-tier of the SEC. This Saturday the Cats will have a real chance to pick up their first win in our new border battle. Here are my picks for the best and worst ways the game could play out:

Best-Case Scenario

Kentucky is ready to roll in Columbia as they coast to a 10-point victory for their first road win since 2010. The defensive pressure forces Matty Mauk into several bad throws early and AJ Stamps capitalizes with a pick six to give the Cats the lead. Patrick Towles, confident from his outing against Miss St, connects on his reads early and Kentucky is able to control from start to finish. Timmons breaks the big catch slump and racks up yet another 100 yard game.

The sixth win moves the Cats into bowl eligibility while also setting up a showdown with Georgia that could be the deciding game for the SEC east. The Cats go on to finish 4-3 for their first winning conference record since 1977.

Worst-Case Scenario

Missouri is currently tied for first in the SEC despite not looking impressive at any point in the season. The Tigers have compiled a 3-1 SEC record thanks to a fourth quarter collapse by South Carolina and a four quarter, full system error by Florida. The same luck continues against Kentucky as Missouri takes advantage of Wildcat miscues and they win 24-17.

Last season Kentucky mad Matty Mauk look like a superstar as he threw for 5 touchdowns to tie a Missouri record. This year he has another breakout game against the Cats. Mauk’s passing allows the Tigers to utilize their one-man rushing attack known as Russell Hansbrough and Missouri is able to grind out a victory against the hapless Wildcats. Kentucky falls to 2-4 in the SEC and the pressure is on for the rest of the season to find that elusive 6th win.

 

With Missouri as just a 7-point favorite this game is a real toss up. Missouri is more than capable of laying an egg at home which they displayed against Indiana. Or the could show up and play like the team leading the SEC east and find themselves on their way to another trip to Atlanta. Which scenario do you expect to see play out this Saturday?

 


Anthony Davis and the NBA are back

Earlier tonight, Charles Barkley said Anthony Davis is the next superstar in the NBA behind LeBron and Kevin Durant, and plays like this are why.

The Pelicans are playing the Magic right now, and Julius Randle and the Lakers will play Terrence Jones’ Rockets at 10:30 p.m. on TNT.


The three minutes that show this is Andrew’s team

Photo by Britney Howard | UK Athletics

After Tyler Ulis dazzled fans in the Bahamas, UK’s guard play has been a popular topic of debate in the Big Blue Nation. Andrew Harrison is a typical Calipari point guard: big, physical, and capable of muscling into the lane for a shot or to pass it back outside. Ulis is small, fast, and can thread the needle with his passes. Two players, two totally different styles.

So far, John Calipari has found a way to showcase both point guards via the platoon system, but I’d argue there was a three minute stretch in the second half last night that proved Andrew Harrison is the superior guard for this squad. In those three minutes, we saw Andrew’s evolution from the indecisive, sloppy freshman to the confident, assertive sophomore that not just understands Cal’s system, but thrives in it.

Let’s break it down.

14:52: Andrew drives in for an easy floater with the assistance of Willie Cauley-Stein.

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14:33: Andrew drives the lane again, drawing a foul. He nails both free throws.

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14:10: With passing lanes blocked to the inside, Andrew evaluates the floor, and with the help of another Willie screen, steps to the top of the key for a three.

andrew4

13:49: The most impressive play in this stretch, and Andrew didn’t even score. Andrew gets the rebound, flies down the court and passes it out to Dominique Hawkins, who kicks it back out to Andrew, who drives the lane again and impressively finds Hawkins across the court for a three. This was the best ball movement of the entire night.

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12:37: Andrew got a lot of criticism last year for his passing, but this nifty little bounce pass to Karl Towns was pretty great.

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12:08: Another great decision by Andrew, who showed off that mid-range jumper that we saw in the Bahamas.

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Nine points, one assist and one rebound in three minutes. Even more, during the brief six minutes Andrew was on the sidelines, he was coaching his teammates:

Photo by Matt McCarty, CatsPause.com

Now if we can just get him to wear his contacts, we’ll be set.


Boom is Back to Being Boom and More in Today’s Practice Notes

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The monsoon I ran into on my way to the practice facility isn’t letting my quote-filled-phone work, but what would KSR be without technical difficulties?  Today’s edition of KSR Practice Notes is brought to you by the word, “Paraphrase.”

–  “Boom being Boom” is how running backs coach Chad Scott described Stanley Williams following his return to the field after a concussion against LSU.  Neal Brown said it was a tough decision between him, Stoops and the medical staff, but considering he’s only a freshman it was a responsible decision to sit him last Saturday.

–  There will be fewer running backs getting carries.  Part of the problem with the running game is that backs aren’t finding their rhythm.  “Put Me in Cold” is a wonderful song, but it’s tough to do as an SEC back, with Brown comparing it to a shooter in basketball.  The only way for shooters to get out of a slump is to keep shooting.  It’s the same philosophy for running backs.  Brown wants to get them more carries, but will not be giving them out to everyone, forcing them to earn it in practice.

Who is that going forward?  Boom’s playmaking ability sets him apart, but other than that, it’s anyone’s game.

–  Towles can take a hit.  He actually kind of likes it.  Part of the reason you saw so many drives started with a QB draw is because getting hit early in the game/drive helps him get comfortable.  Many times fans will get worried he’s taking too many hits, but he isn’t afraid to lower his shoulder for some extra yards, “The more you give them, the less they can give you.  That’s what my dad always taught me.”  Terry Towles is a wise man.

–  Towles learned a lot about not turning the ball over after the Vanderbilt game.  Through 8 games, Patrick Towles has done an exceptional job taking care of the ball, only throwing 4 interceptions so far (a pick every two games).  The Vanderbilt game was the exception; Towles dropped the ball in the pocket three times.  Needless to say, Neal Brown made him learn his lesson by “ingraining” it in him with some “verbiage” after the game.  I’m sure that I would not be allowed to publish what most of that verbiage was.

–  After failing the test against MSU, the Oline has another big one this week.  The Oline got their butts whipped pretty consistently by a great Miss. State Dline.  Their Dline deserves a lot of credit, but it isn’t getting much easier this week.  Mizzou’s Shane Ray might be the best defensive end in the league.  The Cats had some fundamental errors last week, often “leaning” too much before the snap, but Brown was encouraged by their play today calling it their best performance upfront in the last couple of weeks.


Jared Lorenzen is one of ESPN’s 10 “Most Colorful Characters In College Football”

@JaredLorenzen22

@JaredLorenzen22

In honor of the Brian Bosworth’s 30 for 30 documentary airing tonight, ESPN ranked the 10 Most Colorful Characters In College Football. Our own Jared Lorenzen made the cut:

8. Jared Lorenzen, Kentucky

At 6-4, 270 pounds, Lorenzen looked like an offensive lineman, but was lined behind them … as a quarterback. In 2000, as a redshirt freshman, he blew away then-head coach Hal Mumme when he showed up at practice running 4.8 40-yard dashes and slinging 80-yard passes. As UK shuffled through head coaches, Lorenzen shuffled through positions, tucking and running for a dozen TDs on the ground and hauling two more at … wide receiver? Now over 300 pounds, he’s still slinging it, earning a Super Bowl XLII ring as Eli Manning’s backup in New York and doing indoor football time with Kentucky Horsemen, Owensboro Rage, and currently with the Northern Kentucky River Monsters. Just last weekend he tweeted congrats to 6-5, 350-pound Arkansas offensive lineman Sebastian Tretola after his TD pass vs. UAB: “Congrats to the Arkansas OL that threw the TD. That’s one record I’m happy to give up. #fatmanthrowingtd #BBN”

Johnny Football and Deion Sanders also made the list.