Editor’s Note: The following was written by Harold Leeder, editor-in-chief of The New Circle Circular, Lexington’s #1 source of fake news you can’t count on.
Feeling a little bit left out after seeing co-hosts Matt Jones and Drew Franklin jet off to Europe for the summer, Kentucky Sports Radio’s Ryan Lemond has decided to backpack across the state to as many European named cities as he can find so that he will be able to keep up with the conversation when everyone gets back next month. Lemond was trekking across the state at press time so we were not able to speak with him directly but we were able to obtain a few pages from his travel journal.
Lemond began his journey in Florence. He began with an authentic Italian meal in the heart of Kentucky’s Tuscany region, seated alone but surrounded by family at The Olive Garden. Then went to take in some of the beautiful art and architecture that Florence is known for. “Matt I’m not sure if you’ve ever been to Florence, but what a beautiful home for art and design,” the journal read. “My favorite site might be the Duomo, it’s a beautiful gothic cathedral with an unmistakable tiled dome which highlights the top of the city’s skyline, and on the outside it says Florence Y’all.”
The next stop on the trip was London. “London, nestled closer to Manchester than one would think, is home of some fine teas, though mostly sweet.” Lemond continued, “the people talk kind of funny here. I had some fried catfish and some chips for lunch, so that was good. It’s crazy how London, once great, is now merely the shadow of the empire that the sun once never sat upon, especially now that most people prefer Nashville’s hot chicken to KFC’s.”
Then it seems Lemond stopped briefly in Richmond, writing, “I wasn’t sure if Richmond is in Europe or not, it sounds like it might be but I don’t know where. Stopping off just in case.” He also appears to have stopped in Frankfort to get a hot dog and a bratwurst but it’s not clear if that experience was on purpose or by coincidence.
The final stop was in Paris. The journal reads, “Paris is the City of Love (please don’t tell Amanda I came here without her permission). I stopped by a Kroger to speak with a female bagger, they were right, the baguettes are worth the trip (also, please don’t tell Amanda about this). The weird thing was, you always hear about bicycles in Paris but I was in Paris for a while, and didn’t see one bike, there were a lot of people driving there though, just for the deals it seemed, because the only thing I found there was a car dealership.”