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Five Reasons Why Rick Pitino Should Take The New Zealand Job

Rick Pitino reportedly has a job offer from the New Zealand Breakers in Australia’s National Basketball League.

He should take it, and here’s why:


1. He has said he wants to coach again.

First and foremost, Pitino has expressed interest in getting back into coaching. He recently told ESPN, “The level doesn’t matter to me. I just need it to be someone who believes in me.”

New Zealand’s new American ownership believes in Pitino.

2. Edgar Sosa is the Breakers’ star player.

What better way to return to the game than linking back up with one of his all-time favorite players? Edgar Sosa played 140 games over his four-year career under Pitino at Louisville, and now leads the Breakers in both points and assists per game. Sosa is most remembered from his time at UofL for hitting a last-second three-pointer from miles away to beat Kentucky in 2009.

3. The Breakers won the championship in 2013.

Pitino wants a 2013 title banner flying high in his arena; well, he’ll have one in the North Shore Events Centre, where the Breakers play their home games.

4. He can pay players and the FBI won’t care.

This is a two-parter: (1) the NBL is a professional league, so Pitino can (and is expected to) pay his players; and (2) he can do so without concerns of conversations being recorded by the federal government of the United States, which has no jurisdiction or authority in New Zealand.

5. Prostitution is legal in New Zealand.

According to a Google search and not my own personal experiences, New Zealand has some of the most liberal prostitution and sex laws of any country in the world. Brothels and sex services can be found all throughout country, which would allow Pitino to maintain his recruiting strategies from his time at Louisville.


It seems like an easy decision to me.

Article written by Drew Franklin

I can recite every line from Forrest Gump, blindfolded. Follow me on Twitter: @DrewFranklinKSR

12 responses to “Five Reasons Why Rick Pitino Should Take The New Zealand Job”

  1. Catlogic15

    Very nice. Good job!
    Plus they raise a lot of sheep there if the full-out prostitution thing is frowned upon.

  2. Go_Wildcats_Go

    #3 is priceless! Well done Drew!

  3. jos_ros_

    and they’re owned by pardon my take

  4. secrick

    Drew , You must be mistaken. I just heard his best boyfriend Terry Meiners say on the radio last week that he talks to Pitino every day and he is not interested in coaching ever again, so you must be wrong.

  5. jdarren1963

    That…Was…Awesome! Well done, Drew!

  6. AllBlueAllDay

    He is quite “literally” the perfect candidate.

  7. CatManDo

    Also, there are no snakes in New Zealand, just in case you are terrified of snakes.

  8. runningunnin.454

    Seriously, this is his perfect job. You know he would be ridiculed in this country at every away game.

  9. Smyrna_Cat

    “Breakers” would make a nice tat.

  10. 72uksprinter

    And, he’ll get to coach Tai Wynard!

  11. bailey000

    He would definitely have to leave the country to find someone who “believes in” him

  12. catsarerunnin

    Aboriginal strippers are half off.