I realize Kentucky doesn’t play North Carolina until Saturday and there is game before that to worry about, but forgive me for diving headfirst into the Carolina hate. As someone who went to college in North Carolina, I know UNC fans very well, and so it comes as no surprise to me that even as their program is being brought to its knees by the academic scandal, they still manage to come off as elitist, entitled punks.
Last year, I went to the Dean Dome for UK/UNC and because there were “too many reporters and not enough spaces on press row,” UNC Media Relations put me in the crowd for the game, where I was given a harsh refresher course in “The Carolina Way.” For two and a half hours, I listened to fans around me yell about “PayPal Cal,” the evils of one-and-done, and the Tarheels “doing things the right way.” At one point, with my laptop battery on life support and no electrical outlet because, you know, I was in the stands, I argued back, bringing up the academic scandal. It mostly silenced those around me, although a lady behind me “accidentally” spilled her drink all over my computer bag. Nice, right? You can imagine how lovely they were after UK lost.
Anyways, in the spirit of the week, here are my tips for winning any argument with a North Carolina fan, featuring the Academic Scandal Trump Card, a Carolina hater’s secret weapon.