Kentucky Sports Radio

Earlier in the week, I started this super-brilliant post about how Rich Brooks was responding to his team’s shellacking at the hands of Florida by issuing them all “NO FEAR” shirts emblazoned with the all kinds of clever slogans sure to give a sense of fake bravado.  I did hours of research and found some really great NO FEAR slogans and was making them correllate to the beatdown in Gainesville and the season in general.  Ok, I found some of them still lingering in my drawer from seventh grade, but that’s beside the point.  Anyway, somewhere along the line, I decided it was awful and scrapped it, leaving it in some strange internet world and ready to make an appearance on the KSR: Uncut and Unseen episode.  I figured my critique of coaches and their motivational tactics were done. 

But, then this happened….

Hall of Fame LB and 49ers coach Mike Singletary dropped his pants in front of his team.  I repeat, one of the most feared defensive players of all-time shot the moon to his players in an effort to motivate them.  I have to admit that, well, I just don’t get it.  I’ll readily admit that my athletic career peaked with intramural championships (that’s right, it’s plural!!!) and I have no idea what it’s like being a member of any sort of meaningful team.  However, I can’t really picture any instance where I would find my coach’s tail motivational.  Maybe if I had a little cellulite and he had buns of steel, then it might motivate me to do some lunges.   <—–Hilbert hacked my post and inserted that line. 

But, it did get me thinking about some of the more ridiculous motivational tools used for sports teams.  Whether it’s the strange but successful secret veiled bowl that Pat Riley used to motivate the Heat to an NBA title or the weird one-word phrases like “Effort” of “Desire” that high school coaches write across practice shorts, motivation is a very strange thing.  I mean, I can think of nothing I desire less than a teammate’s poop chute, but maybe that’s just me. 

Coaches never seem to fail in finding strange ways to get their team ready to play and….well, I’m not sure where this is heading.  Any good stories?