Kentucky Sports Radio
[Moderated by Matt Jones, Drew Franklin and Tyler Thompson]
[Moderated by Matt Jones, Drew Franklin and Tyler Thompson]
Hello, friends. What’s wrong? Oh, I’m sorry. Dame Maggie Smith might be leaving Downton Abbey? That is terrible news. Her acid-tongued aristocrat was a great character, I know. You must be crushed.
Friends, I’m going to level with you. We all know that the next few months are going to be slow-going. Surely we’ll have a few bright spots, as when our beloved starting five inevitably face the NBA draft, or perhaps more excitement from the UK Baseball team, but let’s not kid ourselves; if you’re a long-time reader of this site you know full well that the months of (late) April, May and June are commonly hailed as “dead months” for college sports as we sit around waiting to ramp up to football season. So I’m not going to lie: things are bound to get abstract in this time slot. I say this so you’ll all be aware of what’s to come, in case you’re the type of person who routinely hates what’s written here on Wednesdays and Fridays at 1:00. As I start to pull together some ideas for this upcoming period, I thought I might share from my personal notebook some thoughts for upcoming columns in a piece we’ll call, aptly, the Brainstorming Checklist. I’m also open to suggestions. So feel free to print off this page, check mark the ideas and concepts you like, and mail them postage-due to the KSR Compound. We’ll tally the votes and see what shakes out in the next few months. And, as always, happy Wednesday everyone. Remember, I love you.
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___ Photo Gallery: Foods shaped like Marques Teague
___ Tubby Smith Writes a Letter to Rafferty’s Demanding Reinstatement of his Lifetime Gift Card
___ If SEC Coaches were Baroque Period Composers
___ FAQ: The Qdoba Mexican Grill on Euclid Avenue
___ Monologue: “Renardo Sidney, Upon Waking to a Kafka-esque Nightmare of Escapism, Alienation and Futility”
___ Tom Leach and Alan Cutler Discuss Favorite Episodes of Family Ties
___ By the Numbers: Helmet Guy’s Blood Alcohol Content
___ Erotic Fan Fiction about Jerry Tipton
___ Photoshop Feature: Charlie Strong’s Face Superimposed onto Vegetables
___ Prank-Calls to Alex Oriakhi
___ Replacing Words in Pitbull Song Titles with Names of Players from the 1985-86 Wildcat Roster
___ Hologram Rodney Dent on the Barnstorming Tour
___ Adam Chiles Biography
___ Ryan Lemond: Dinosaur Hunter
___ Not Dick Gabriel (?)
___ Dirty Limericks about “Blarges”
___ A pre-season preview of Alabama Football entirely in binary code
___ Fake French Person Writing about UK Rifle Team
___ Short Story: Robot Mitch Barnhart Orders a Milkshake
___ Random information I Googled Applied in a Non-Sequitir to UK Sports
___ Exclusive Q&A: Orlando Antigua’s Favorite Breakfast Foods
___ A comprehensive breakdown of the 1996 Final Four re-enacted by pre-1894 Presidents
___ All of the Above
___ None of the Above
___ Tomlin’s terrible. Matt, please get him off the site.
—————
Hooray for the dead period! I’ll try to keep things as easy and painless as possible. Promise. We’ll all get through this together. Somehow.
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Bill Keightley Report : Never to be forgotten.
9 queries. 0.355 seconds
April 18th, 2012 at 2:02 pm
+64+64+6
April 18th, 2012 at 2:05 pm
I’m Rexy and I know it???
April 18th, 2012 at 2:06 pm
Uhh, have you heard how good our baseball team is? It is far from a dead period thats for sure.
April 18th, 2012 at 2:07 pm
This sounds oddly fascinating………A comprehensive breakdown of the 1996 Final Four re-enacted by pre-1894 Presidents. Tony Delk would certainly be best represented with Martin Van Buren and Franklin Pierce would make a great Mark Pope.
April 18th, 2012 at 2:11 pm
Definitely gotta go with Dirty Limericks about “Blarges”
April 18th, 2012 at 2:11 pm
Our dead period looks like it will extend ’til November this year.
April 18th, 2012 at 2:12 pm
Rick Pitino would be played by a clean-shaven Abraham Lincoln!
April 18th, 2012 at 2:15 pm
If I go back in time to 1996 will I still know that Rick Pitino is a villian?
April 18th, 2012 at 2:17 pm
They should all be written, but definitely The Comprehensive breakdown of the 1996 Final Four re-enacted by pre-1894 Presidents…oh, and if SEC Coaches were Baroque Period composers. Good ideas for a dead period.
April 18th, 2012 at 2:20 pm
What I would really love in the “dead period” is stories from old timers, and if possible, anyone who can find rights
to some old games we can listen to from back in the day would be awesome. To hear some of those old Cawood
games would be really something to look forward to, or even more of the call-in shows. But yeah, we need some
old-timers to step up and tell their memeories and tales in that way that only Kentucky old-timers can. Where
else would we learn to think of our Cayts in terms of findin’ their “climbin’ gear”!?! : )
April 18th, 2012 at 2:20 pm
#8 lol
April 18th, 2012 at 2:20 pm
How about a 2012 starting five jock strap tour!
April 18th, 2012 at 2:21 pm
No, I think Van Buren has to play Anthony Epps…though James Madison could do it too. I think John Tyler could make a great Tony Delk. Lincoln would be a good McCarty, because both are kind of gangly.
April 18th, 2012 at 2:22 pm
Tom Leach and Alan Cutler Discuss Favorite Episodes of Family Ties <— THIS
April 18th, 2012 at 2:23 pm
I heard Millard Fillmore could “fill it up” from 3.
April 18th, 2012 at 2:24 pm
C’mon Tomlin, you completely omitted to newly re-released Classic film in “Technocolor” no less starring Micky Rooney and Judy Garlan. “Andy Hardly gets a Hemroid Hicky” soon to be on Netflix in early June…. Sheesh!
April 18th, 2012 at 2:25 pm
Call me crazy, but the sexual exploits of Jerry Tipton sound amusing. I don’t know if you can call it “fan” fiction though.
April 18th, 2012 at 2:26 pm
A list of college basketball players, coaches, or broadcasters who have TV/ Movie character look-a-likes. We are all pretty familiar with Kevin Stallings/ Bill Deauterive, Darren Horn/ George McFly, Tom Crean/ Dwight Schrute, Billy Donovan/ Eddie Munster and Pat Forde/Mr. Hanky from South Park. There have to be some other really good ones.
April 18th, 2012 at 2:27 pm
Everything from ‘Dirty Limericks About Blarges’ to ‘Exclusive Q&A: Orlando Antigua’s Favorite Breakfast Foods’ will do just fine. Looking forward to ‘Short Story: Robot Mitch Barnhart Orders a Milkshake’
April 18th, 2012 at 2:28 pm
I would like to see a hologram team of tupacs schrimage the WBA
April 18th, 2012 at 2:36 pm
#FollowAnthonyBennett
April 18th, 2012 at 2:38 pm
Yahoo is loving themselves some UK news recently. Articles about the starting five leaving and John Wall playing too many charity games in the offseason. #allcatseverything
http://sports.yahoo.com/blogs/ncaab-the-dagger/kentucky-five-underclassmen-turn-pro-clearing-space-next-003041510.html
http://sports.yahoo.com/blogs/nba-ball-dont-lie/john-wall-thinks-played-too-many-charity-games-140111401.html;_ylt=A2KLOzLgCY9PekwAllxNbK5_
April 18th, 2012 at 2:50 pm
Erotic Fan Fiction about Jerry Tipton … ugh.
April 18th, 2012 at 2:57 pm
who the hell is “marques teagues”?
April 18th, 2012 at 2:57 pm
Replacing Words in Pitbull Song Titles with Names of Players from the 1985-86 Wildcat Roster
“Hey Rob Lock (Drop It to the Floor)”
April 18th, 2012 at 3:04 pm
There once was a call on the stage large.
Some thought it should be a charge.
Others saw block.
Said ref, what a crok,
If it was anything it was a blarge.
(ok, so not dirty, but…)
April 18th, 2012 at 3:23 pm
There once was a girl named Kate
Who lived on a street named State.
When UK proved they’re the best,
She showed us her breasts,
And I totally blarged my pants.
April 18th, 2012 at 4:01 pm
Post about http://bluegrassrevolution.com/
Lexington’s newest Pro team. that includes athletes from UK
April 18th, 2012 at 4:05 pm
so there i was, waiting for the pizza guy to show up and, magically, from my back door appeared a man who called himself Jerry “just the tip”ton……
April 18th, 2012 at 4:44 pm
Every time I see an article by Tomlin, I start reading and about 2 sentences in I ask myself, WTF is this!? I just don’t understand his sense of humor. Could someone help me out here?
April 18th, 2012 at 4:53 pm
30. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tongue-in-cheek
April 18th, 2012 at 7:33 pm
Not the last one! Tomlin is hilarious. He needs to be on the site more!!
April 18th, 2012 at 7:43 pm
@31 I understand tongue-in-cheek, basically I’m trying to say I don’t understand how he is humorous. I just think what he says is stupid, has no point, etc.
April 18th, 2012 at 8:52 pm
#28: Pretty neat, pretty cool. But I’m a li’l confused. Why the fleur de lis?
Lexington isn’t a French river city, and has no connection with that
symbol, because the city that would have a connection to that
symbol in Kentucky, DOESN’T EXIST. ‘Splain me, Lucy!
April 19th, 2012 at 2:56 pm
WTF, I’m just taking a stab in the dark here, but you probably don’t ‘get it’ because you think things like ‘Everybody Loves Raymond’ or the comic strip ‘For Better or Worse’ are funny. Just because something is not to your taste, that doesn’t mean you need to be a critical dickhead about it. Plenty of us think Tomlin is funny as hell.