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Who Do You Think You Are, Marquette Golden Eagle Mascot?

I have often believed that my first experience with a majestic, soaring creature as yourself would be one I would always treasure, write about in my journal and recollect later as one of the moments in my life I encountered something truly special.

All of this hope came crashing to the earth last night when, in a moment I could never have predicted, I was shot down and completely refused an interview with the mascot of Marquette’s Golden Eagles.

This would all be understandable if I’d been denied by Pitt coach Jamie Dixon, even sparkplug Buzz Williams. But I was cast aside by a person in a furry eagle costume.

After the game, as the figure stood in the foyer off court, I approached to get an interview. Because, hey, it’s a MASCOT. The eagle looked at me, shook his head no, and just walked off.

We enjoyed our time in Marquette, to be sure. Campus was fun and I haven’t seen that many white people dancing since Coke Zero came out. But dissed by a person in an eagle costume? That’s a first. And I’ve been dissed by the best of them.

With the Marquette Golden Eagle mascot now my sworn enemy, rest assured I will not rest until this injustice has been avenged. It will involve a series of elaborately planned motions which will ultimately conclude with this mascot feeling the same shame and disappointment as I felt last night. And he will bow his giant, oversized eagle head in shame. And I will have bested him.

You’re on the list, Golden Eagle. You’re on notice. Don’t forget that.

On to Northern Iowa today, perhaps stopping to milk a cow along the way if there’s time. Don’t forget, gang, to join us back here tonight for a LIVE BLOG at 7:00 PM, where you’ll get more information from our exploits. We miss you already, and will be back in your loving arms soon, Kentucky.

Article written by C.M. Tomlin

24 responses to “Who Do You Think You Are, Marquette Golden Eagle Mascot?”

  1. Justin

    Is that matt in the left corner of that picure? He sure is Mr. Smiley!

  2. philuk


  3. philuk


  4. Keeping it Real

    Hey Tomlin, maybe he thought you wanted to pluck him…..

  5. golden eagle

    Go PLUCK yourself Tomlin!

  6. Rules Committee

    You do know that eagles are protected don’t you?

  7. Morehead State Eagle

    Just don’t take it out on me! Golden Eagles think they are so special… ie)Tenn Tech and Marquette

  8. cole aldritch's other tooth

    Man, you guys need to come back to God’s country. KSR is not feeling the love!

  9. Tobias Funke

    Mail him an envelope full of DDT.

    /environmentalist humor

  10. al mcguire

    Eagle? I thought it was a Warrior!

  11. Magic Johnson In A Wheelchair

    These non-UK posts are pretty terrible. Please just stop and talk about Kentucky. No one cares where you are, no one cares what you’re doing when it comes to other teams that useless.

  12. bilhelm

    If Ben Franklin would have gotten his way it would have been more like a Golden Turkey, or even Shower.

  13. irishwildcat

    ok this has nothing to do with the above post but I would like to bring to everyone’s attention how much Kevin Stallings and Bill from King of the Hill look alike, someone else may have already brought this up but it is worth mentioning again.

  14. MCStayUpLateâ„¢

    Probably because you hob-nob with the Turkey Hunter. Those birds like to stick together you know…

  15. bilhelm

    Hey, Magic! How about you roll on out of here. If you feel you are being overcharged for the content of this site please cancel your membership and your prorated nothing will be refunded to you.



  16. Ray Carrico

    Hey you are going to see more pigs than cows . road inthe RAGBRI accr0ss the state of Iowa and in each county we crossed the local farm association were out by the road grilling iowa pork chops for sale to the 10000 bicycle rides that wer traveling accross the state . Have fun on your visit.

  17. sethicus59

    i lold

  18. TOMPAV83

    Tomlin, you are my favorite!

  19. Jennifer

    Picture it, Tomlin. Nashville, 2003. The Utah Runnin’ Ute, on stilts, takes off the head of the Oregon Duck. A real fight ensues and neither mascot is allowed to take the floor in the second half. The biggerst insult to the Golden Eagle is to somehow remove his mascot head. Start plotting.

  20. Cal Purnell here

    We miss u

  21. NashvilleCat

    19- I remember that fight, I was in the stands, it was awesome. I remember the Duck trying to knock the Ute off the stilts and the fight ensued after that. The crowd went crazy.

  22. NotTheSlickistRick

    Just another filthy bird. Not to worry

  23. buk

    I’ll call Big Red. He will come and kick that golden eagle’s ass.

  24. jeff gordon

    it is probably 1 of ky’s ex players. since none of them have to open books like bobby knight says, they can’t get jobs. they sure as hell can’t make it in the NBA. and none of them graduated. so go be a mascot.let the calipari cancer spread thru your b-ball program. can you say PROBATION AGAIN. this time Rick P won;t be there to bail you out.ha ha ha ha ha ha