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Five More Who Wants to Be A Blogger Finalists


funny

They keep coming….this group has a 45 year old man, an underwear salesman and a Snedegar fan. Enjoy…

TYE BURKLOW

Good morning/afternoon/evening whatever it might be as you read this amazing introduction. I won’t bore you with a lot of stupid details about myself because I’m sure you don’t really care. We are all here for one reason….we bleed blue…OR you are one of the other SEC schools’ fans and your school sucks so bad right now because everyone in the country wants to come to UK, that you had to come to KSR to see what real college basketball is like! But we welcome you all the same. My name is Tye Burklow. I am 24 years old from Bowling Green, KY, and I am currently an underwear salesman. I am 1 of the 20 finalists for “I want to be a blogger,” and I won’t lie…when I hear the word “blogger” I picture that guy that sits in his room with his door shut with a bottle of lotion posted up by his computer just in case his parent’s parental controls miss an “interesting” website. Yet again, I am that guy (minus the lotion and parental controls….seriously!), so to say that I am thrilled to be one of the 20 is an understatement! I have bled blue since I was born, and minus a 5 year stint in college at WKU, I have been fully committed to this relationship…..and without Coach Cal’s tweets of inspiration every morning I don’t know where I would be today…..possibly a Cards fan!

GARRETT SPARKS

28, psychiatry resident, O positive, dress left.

Howdy folks. I’m a native Ashlander and 2003 UK grad. I was subsequently exiled to Big Ten country (5 years in Ann Arbor ), and I’m now a resident physician in western Pennsylvania , hiding among the Pitt fans, paying out the ear for the ESPN Full Court package. I tutored a handful of the basketball guys in calculus and chemistry, and Erik Daniels and Keith Bogans nearly ran me over on Euclid in some little white hatchback. I have mutts named Derby and Julep, and my I converted my wife from her evil UT-loving ways prior to our wedding behind Memorial Coliseum. I made my parents paint an entire room purple and teal just because Rex Chapman was drafted by the Hornets (and my bedroom was already blue and white). I got into a fight with a pathology resident in the med school student lounge after Gerald Fitch missed the 3 against UAB, and he wouldn’t quit running his mouth about how Duke was going to win it all that year. And if that doesn’t qualify me to write for KSR, I don’t know what will.

CLIFF BRIGGS

Here you go: Name Cliff Briggs – age 45 – general account for automotive company. I also am an Assistant Coach for Maury Middle School boys basketball team. I have been a life long UK fan trapped in the state of Tennessee. Hope to be able to become part of the KSR family and continue the tradition of writing information for all UK fans across the nation. Want to bring enjoyment in the future unlike one having to watch the sweat hog that resides down the road from me – remember “Best sign in Knoxville – Lexington 164 miles”

ADAM STRATTON

Pharmacist, 26 years old

I’ve been writing since Mom spit me out of the womb in Eastern Kentucky. My few claims to fame include having an article published in the Kentucky Kernel (UK’s newspaper) in 2004, being quoted by Pat Forde from a Cats Pause thread in his ESPN article, and starting a WWF (back when it was called that) website that got 9,000 hits per day at its peak. I used the pseudonym Stratosis for the site, and if I win this contest, I might write under that to make Fake Gimel happy. My UK sporting event prowess ranges everywhere from being on the field after the LSU game in 2007 to being hit in the head with a puck at a hockey game. Twice. Other than that I’ve been working as a pharmacist in Phoenix, Arizona for the past year and still trying to plant bluegrass in the desert.

CHRISTOPHER JOHNS

Hi. I’m Chris. I was born and raised on a tobacco farm in Jessamine County, Kentucky. My family wasn’t super rich and participated in what we liked to call “Completing Our Glassware Set” after UK basketball and football games. This is an activity where the whole family combs the stadium looking for used plastic collector cups for use at home. The Johns family is nothing if not resourceful. I attended UK twice. The first time I was kindly asked to leave by the Administration of The Great U because I did not, in their opinion, fulfill the obligations of a scholarship student. Things like “attending class” and “studying”. In 1995, I was too busy helping Walter McCarty carbo load and running numbers for Antoine Walker to study. Anyway, I went back a year later on my own dime and graduated with a degree in Economics and Management. I later married a Mechanical Engineer (also a UK grad). We are really fun at parties. Between the regression analysis and structural integrity banter, the good times just never stop. I got a job at a local healthcare establishment in the IT department and have been there ever since. I tailgate to every home UK football game and am the proud owner of a Jeff Snedegar #17 jersey that my wife won’t let me wear in public. I don’t think the BCS is evil, I think Chris Berman is, and I believe that instant replay helped UK football more than any single coach or player. If I had one wish it would be that the internet and KSR was around to cover both the Bernadette Locke-Mattox and Eddie Sutton eras. I hope to add some content and insight to KSR so that it stays one of the best sources for UK information and entertainment. Thanks for giving me a shot.

Article written by Matt Jones

43 responses to “Five More Who Wants to Be A Blogger Finalists”

  1. Black Label Wildcat

  2. Beatle Bum

    Chris, if your wife let’s you be Sned in the bedroom, that is probably good enough!! Eh???

    Don that jersey, my boi!!!

  3. Beatle Bum

    Adam, I am having a real problem getting past the mental image of your mom spitting you out of the wombage!!

  4. HeGetsIt

    Now that’s what I’m talking about!!!! I’m talking about the new Evony ads on the right side (insert porno music here)

  5. Beatle Bum

    I was just wondering what kind of talent Maury was going to have this year! Can we get Cliff’s notes on that! (corny, I know)

    Derby and Julep???? Those names might disqualify you, Garrett. Doesn’t that violate some man law?

    And, Tye, keep it brief. (sorry, I could not help myself)

  6. sevaen

    Stratosis all the way man! You’ve got my support! – Brandon T

  7. Assassin Number 2

    Chris Johns for blogger of the year!

    No Justice No Peace, Free Anthony Dixon!

  8. NotTheSlickistRick

    YAWN……………..

  9. recruit_a_shooter

    Damn, that Evony chick just keeps getting better.

  10. recruit_a_shooter

    Cal said he’s going to announce something this afternoon. Any idea what it is?

  11. GoCats2010

    8. I was waiting for our Evony ad to change to her, I’ve seen it elsewhere

  12. shamsway

    get this chris johns guy out! what a loser.

    NEXT.

  13. WildcatDJ

    You’ll need that lotion one day Tye…

  14. SWATS

    Jeff Snedegar was the MAN! One of my all time favorite UK football players

  15. Pikeville25

    Stratosis…where is teletubby stalker?? Haha….u got my vote.

  16. nickk

    even at the risk sounding like a huge a-hole, i really think they should just let a paranoid schizophrenic be the next blogger. imagine the possibilities. im sure the posts wouldnt make any sense, but they would be a helluva lot of fun to read.

  17. reinle11

    Christopher- Regression analysis is fun…not

  18. Waterview1

    Burklowe is a Wildcat by birth. A Franklin-Simpson Wildcat. Fullback I believe…in miniature. Definitely NOT in the image of former Wildcat Joker Phillips.

  19. Basteballer

    Seriously underwhelmed.

  20. Carolina Blue is past tense for CAROLINA BLOWS

    Yo Adam Stratton–What part of the city? I am in Chandler. Leaving tomorrow for Lex to be in a wedding. I think I may stop by and get one of the hot CATS hats. That is, if oneness287 will let me in his store. We went at it pretty hard yesterday. Who am I kidding, the guy only orders 30 at a time and they fly off of the shelves.

  21. MrBlueHead

    just like Mr. Johns we had a nice set of glassware provide from left behind Rupp cups. We also got our flatware there, I love me some sporks. ONIONS, Mr Johns keep up the good work.

  22. Crow

    “continue the tradition of writing information for all UK fans”

    Can you teach us to cipher numbers, too?

  23. jonnyho

    Chris Johns stole my Jeff Snedegar #17 underwear the other day and I want them back! He’s a good blogger though.

  24. Crow

    I think Matt’s strategy of using these guys to make BTI look good just might work.

  25. NotTheSlickistRick

    Looks like Matt missed out on his golden opportunity to do some pro bono work while endearing himself to UK fans for eternity.

    http://www.wlky.com/news/20113717/detail.html

  26. wildcatmatt

    Seriously, just because I have to….

    Christopher Johns.

    Lesser of all evils…next five please.

  27. BPsycho

    CHRISTOPHER JOHNS

  28. ukcatfan88

    I also have a #17 jersey my wife hates. We may be married to the same woman. Hope that’s working out for you……

    So we have a Sye and a Tye in this contest? Seriously?

    I go to a music store called Fye. I got hit in the Eye by a rock the other day. I said Bye to my wife when I left home this morning. I like to Dye Easter eggs. Soap used to me made of Lye. There was once an actor named Louie Nye….I could go on all day.

  29. catsaurus

    Garrett Sparks!

  30. Thomas Beisner

    28, I dare you to try…e?

    Damn.

  31. Tyler Thompson

    When did KSR become a dating website? I’d really like to see these bloggabees write about Kentucky, not themselves.

  32. Carolina Blue is past tense for CAROLINA BLOWS

    #31–There’s my girl. Did you enter this year? To answer your question, this was the criteria set out by Matt & Co. so everyone had to follow strict guidelines with a twist.

    As you can attest, this will drag out until Midnight Madness so we might as well make the best of it.

  33. MtnCat

    Yes, pass them all to the next round. There is some talent there and their credentials pass the initial test.

  34. Tyler Thompson

    #32-There’s my boy! To answer your question, no, I did not enter this year. After my brief brush with bloggabee fame, I’m happy to rock the peanut gallery with the rest of the plebeians. 🙂

  35. blackgoldandblue

    Tye Burklow should be disqualified for even mentioning the possibility of being a Cards fan.

  36. CalifCatFan

    Tyler Thompson, will you marry me?

  37. The Tye Burklow

    #18 wow been bottling up some feelings since ol hs football I see……Yet one would have to say it would be very hard to live up to the image of Joker….but yet you seem to remember alot of details about me….guess I left a Big impression.

    I would rather die than be a cards fan I might add!!

  38. IloveUKdoU

    I agree with #35, Tye Burklow nor for that matter, any else should NEVER,
    NEVER type the words—possibly a Cards fan.

  39. Beatle Bum

    I vote for Tyler!!! (sorry, old habits die hard – no punnage intended)

  40. Waterview1

    Burklowe drove some Dragons crazy one night. So crazy they made fools of themselves.

  41. soup

    CHRISTOPHER JOHNS

  42. robby

    Casting my vote for Stratton

  43. Shmeli

    http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/columns/story?columnist=forde_pat&id=2827370&sportCat=ncb

    I think I failed the same test, so my vote goes for Stratosis.